Selling Of Dreams

This will be quick and straight to the point.
I will say whatever you want to hear but continue to do what I please. I hate questions with motives about my actions. Especially if I am offended by what your asking or if the answer is obvious! I will give you the answer you want and walk away and laugh!

I sell dreams! Goodnight!

End

Ownership

This is just an informative piece!

Family, friends and strangers, whoever may read my blog I honestly hope you enjoy it. Please do not come into this under the impression that this is the same side of Stephanie that you see at family events or at the mall! This blog is a release for me. If I offend please take your mouse and move to top right of this page. Do you see the X please click! GOODBYE!

I will not censor my language or thoughts for anyone! This is MY blog. I appreciate the readers and comments but if you "can't take it I am not going to pull out" <-Things like that may occur again and again. In other words I write what I want and it won't change!
I have ownership!

Thanks or Goodbye

END

Masturbation

Ay! Caught your attention!!

The title symbolizes my lifestyle! I am always in it for myself. I am going to please myself before anyone else. I am 19 years old with no responsibility this is my time! I am going to be selfish and maybe a little indecisive. I live for me and only me. I love myself and I'm going to DO me!

Take my advice and "masturbate"

END

Stephanie Documentation 17

I am not perfect!

I don't care about your feelings!

I have flaws and so do you, so remember that.

I'm me and I continue to grow into a better me. I am myself approved and verified!

Employment

I believe that Wendy International has a conspiracy to get rid of me!! I think they have been working on it for months cause its pretty good! They continue to schedule me with people they know I cannot stand. I continue to inform my managers that they are going to have to give the police report when I slap someone! They laugh as I look for weapons! They are trying me guys and I am losing!

END

Worst 25

My family is big on religion and a strong relationship with God! I love that and I mosy definitely respect it. I am more than aware that everyone is not perfect and we all make mistakes but when people constantly point them out it gets old. When it gets old my attitude gets brand new. Who are you to judge? I apologize your life has amounted to nothing and your miserable but I do not want to be your company. Save your speeches on how others could be better and work on yourself. I am me and I love it. I hate that I let you ruin my Christmas. Your demons killed my holiday spirit and your disrespect made my stomach hurt. Your sad excuse for a positive christian influence makes me life. Be thankful that I pray for my enemies!

END

Stephanie Documentation 16

So I am torn! So torn. I wish I could go back to last year!

END

The Lost Vlog

This is old and I'm kinda sad I forgot about it. Enjoy! lol

Attitude

Let me tell you about the death trap that my school had me in this week, a week before exams at that. I did not need all that undue stress. Due to 60 mph my window decides it wants to crack. From top to bottom that is! Then my heat decides it does not want to work. So of course I complain and these fools tell me make a work order request! WHAT? I am not requesting nothing I am demanding somebody with some tools to come over here fix this. My window is cracked and they act like my kitchen sink got a leak. Please go somewhere with that. So I leave because I cannot stay in these unlivable conditions. I come back TWO days later and my room is still cold and and window still cracked. I am not paying thousands of dollars to live in the projects. My name is not Zaquenna and I do not have 6 kids and 5 baby daddys. People around here need to treat me like my name is Becky and I got a trust fund. SMH!

I always gotta act a fool to get something done. They got me barging into the housing directors office and snapping on the head of maintence. "Listen here Bob the Builder go get one of your little workers to fix my heat before I really do some damage to that room and give yall a full week of work". I was asked to leave. I did not leave. So then I was escorted to my room but when I got there guess what? I was met by two men that were there to work on my heat!

Hate It

Can I tell you what I hate?!?

When I let people BORROW money and they take their sweet time trying to give it back!!
When I let you borrow money honey I am like a bill!! Pay me back as soon as you receive some money or im calling and if i had stamps I would mail you a letter! I do not care if it was five dollars give me my money! People these days be trying to test me! Then you owe me money and I see you at the mall. Excuse me Miss. Broke or Mr. NoCash ...donde esta mi dinero?!? You better be buying me something while you at the mall or out to eat!! Do not let me catch you with nothing new when you own me money. Not a hat, belt, earing, bracelet, bobbypin, cologne, socks, bodywash toothbrush or laundry detergent! When I say nothing I mean nothing. If i do not have my money within two weeks consider me all in your business and in your face. I will be worse than the IRS !

I really hate that.

Why I don't care

No one is perfect and we are built to face problems. That is my definition of a human. We are also built to come over these problems. A problem can mean many different things, people and situations. What I am going to talk about today is the problems dealing with people.

As humans we cannot please everyone and I have accepted that along time ago. It seems odd to me when people announce there dislike for something I do or said, or just for me and they are surprised by my reaction. Or lack of reaction I should say

And this is why...

Why should I stress over you? Who are you to me? What can you do for me? If your existence is pointless to my future success why should I care that you do not like me? If someone can give me a illegitimate answer to those questions than maybe I will change the way I think.

Why don't you pay some of these bills! Why don't you cut a check for this tuition! Then I will consider giving you the privilege of being on mind.


-END

Stephanie Documentation 15

I hate when people hint at stuff. Let me know. Say what is on your mind. I was momentarily annoyed until I realized you don't mean anything!

END

Liars

Dora the Explorer mad me mad

I really hope the title of this blog does not stray you away from READWITHCAUTION! Let me first say that I like Dora, I always have. Boots and Backpack too, Map sort of annoys me but I accept Dora and all her friends. I love that she speaks Spanish and is friends with a monkey, this teaches kids to accept diversity. It is fine to be friends with people who are not exactly like you, that is my favorite aspect of Dora. But what I just viewed was the wrong message to send to kids and I am confused as to why Dora was on at 8 PM, but let me get to the point.

Swiper the lovable theif on the show which I feel is unnesearry anyways stole everybodys presents and the star on the Christmas Tree or something like that. I only seen the end. Bottom line he ruined Christmas and lets face he attempts to take somehing every episode. Not cool.

What made me mad was Dora jumping up so quick to give up her presents to Swiper and talking about she cares about and wants to share! What the hell?!? Uh No Dora! You let him know he was wrong and he needs to deal with the consequences of doing something bad. She was way to quick and enthusiastice to forgive and give up her goods! (Take that how you want to)

I understand that this is a childrens show and maybe it is not the serious but WHATEVER. I wouldn't want my daughter coming home talkin about "I gave it to him", "I know he steals from me but I forgive him". She would get slapped. I am not saying it is good to hold grudges but we cannot be all "willy nilly" either. I am just saying!

NO BUENO!
END!

Undefined Change

It always seems to happen in my friendship and it always has annoyed me. There had not been one friend where it has not happened and I don't get it.

Is there actually a problem or is it me blowing things out of proportion.
A shift in a friendship or a change that makes it awkward. No one is mad but the air is different.

Well it always happens but never really lasts that long. Me and my friend Raven had this "undefined change" and thank God it is over! We are finally getting back to normal and it's great. I wish all of you could experience the mess that is Raven. I mean mess is the most positive aspects! Lol

END

Stephanie Documentation 14

Your actions disgust me. Your attitude annoys me. Your lifestyle needs major improvements. I am disgusted and annoyed.

Investment

Have you ever felt the security in knowing that someone is never going to go anywhere? No matter what you say or what you do they will always be there. I hope you can appreciate that, because a lot of people do not have that type of person in their life. If you do have this person you should thank them for being who they are.

Always remember to invest your time appropriately. Remember the people who will be there in the end. Make a good investment and the outcome will be great. Something that you can benefit from in the end.


END

Time

Defintion of a Man

A man is not defined by how many women they have had.
A man is not defined by how many children they have or how much money they make.
A man is defined by what he does and what he has accomplished.
A man is defined by the company he keeps and the example he sets
You are a sad excuse for a man and I have searched my whole entire being looking for a shred of respect that I have for you and I cannot find any. I used to have sympathy for you and make excuses in my head. Now when I think of you I feel absolutely nothing. No sadness nor anger. I will not waste the energy to think of your insignificant existence in correlation to my life. I feel sorry for the people that are forced to be around you. I will pray for them and I only pray that someone in the world is praying for you. Because at this point I cannot even bring my self to do so. I am extremely disappointed in you as a son, a brother most importantly a father.

You are a male, not a man!
You should be ashamed.

END

Cheaters!

Twitter asked for it...sorry for the delay!! :)

Something New!

Amusing

I find it beyond hilarious when people are angry with me for the things that I love about myself. So many people wish I acted a different way so that they can have their way with me.

I will never apologize for having morals.
I will never apologize for being strong.

If you do not like this please move on because these are two things that will never change. I am incapable of lowering myself to disrespectful standards to please others. Those who care will want my happiness and they will understand.

I am so unusually amazing. I act this way because I am blessed and thankful! You should try it!

While they are angry, I laugh.

END

Have you met them

This is something I think about sometimes. It always happens to cross my mind!

Do you think you have met your spouse?

I don't even mean an ex girlfriend or boyfriend, do you believe that you know who your spouse is going to be. Are they in your life right now ? A friend or even a coworker? Maybe a current enemy that you miss....

Hope this made you think!

-END

Stephanie Documentation 13

I always seem to exaggerate everything. I don't know why.

I am going to take it back a little but stick with me.

"Breathe, stretch, shake , let it go"

Lol

It works!

End

Thin Line

Where is line drawn?! When am I not supposed to care?! I know there is a difference between giving advice and giving orders. It may have taken me awhile to learn this but I did. When I know something is wrong should I say something?! Or do I wait to be approached? What if the situation goes to far? I always want to help my friends but never know what is too much. Lately I have not been saying anything but I am starting to think that silence is not golden. Please define this line for me.

Be harmless not helpful....maybe. I am really unsure!

Oppurtunities

I hate to see when people do not take advantage of the opportunities that are in front of them. It never made sense to me and it never will. Better yourself by any means possible. Do not settle for less.

May I Inform you?

Sometimes I feel as if you think you have me. Have me right where you want me. May I inform you that you do not. Please do not think what you do for me goes unappreciated because that is not the case. I am so grateful. I care for you deeply and that will never change, but you will never have me like you want to have me until....Well it is no fun if I tell you. Hope you figure it out!

Weekend

This weekend was a good one. It consisted of my favorite things. Good friends, good food, great shopping. I was with my good friend Laurie and she was the best host. Time to go back to Indiana and hit these books HARD! I am ok with that though because of my good weekend. All smiles!

END

Self Worth

Know your place and understand what you deserve. Don't sell yourself short. Have respect for yourself. Make yourself proud. You are special and someone cares for you just the way you need them to. I hope you are doing right when they happen to look your way. Self worth, what is it to you!?

END!

True Love

It is what you do to me. How you stay with me after. When I see you I get excited, lik it is the first time. Your like nothing else I know. Truly content. You complete me. No one does what you do for me. Only we can understand our level of intimacy! When you are on my body I can barley control myself. Especially when your cute.

Man I love shopping for clothes.
Ha I know I am special.

Stephanie Documentation 12

Look here strangers and friends, I am not the nicest person you will meet!! Sorry I am not about smiles, puppies and lollipops. When I speak I do it for laughs I honestly do not think about your feelings with that said I do not do it intentionally either if I was to hurt your feelings. Please do not read deeply into what I say I only mean half of it. I usually don't say the "s" word so please don't take it so seriously. I am always in it for laughs so I am going to say some off the wall stuff. Be prepared!

END

Leave me Clueless

I think it is important that I inform you all when I am using my blackberry to blog. It sends the urgency factor. Well this is that time blackberry honey!

Do me a favor and leave me clueless. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people do not do what they say they are going to do. If you are not sure then shut up. Please save your breath on pointless conversation. SMH! Leave me clueless it is better that way. Better for YOU! When I am disappointed or angry it is not good for you.

That is all!!

END

Show me you care

Be inquisitive.
Be strong.
Be supportive.
Tell me when I am wrong. Correct it.
Smile at me.
Tell me what you see when you look at me.
Be honest.
Be open.
Trust me.
Look into my eyes. If I can look back I care....trust.
Be concerned

Want my happiness above anything.
Prove it.

Ways to show me...

-END

Emotion are Nature

Emotions can be the most destructive but most terribly beautiful aspect of someones life. It can act as Hurricane Katrina or be a rainbow on your life! Not just a colorful vision in the sky but the deeper meaning of a promise never to hurt you in such ways.

You cannot help the way you feel but you can control what happens next.

Emotions are natural but choices are made.

Flow like a calm river, take the wild ride down a waterfall just don't crash into the rocks below. Maneuver around, make that choice always. The route where the horizon is most beautiful and not what offers you only temporary happiness.

Emotions are nature.
It is ok to Rain.
Hurricanes and Tornado's happen but always remember the calm after the storm.

I dont know where it came from but there it is!
END

Ew.

I haven't been on in awhile and I hate that I am coming back angry!! Twitter does not allow enough characters for me to say exactly what I want.

Disrespected and disgusted! Excuse the alliteration, I did not do it purposely. That is exactly how I feel right now. I show little kindness to people and when it is revealed I guess it is taken for weakness. TAH, bitches, tah mothafkkn tah! Never again. I am done with the both of you two. You both are disgusting, beyond trifiling and deserve a trip to the clinic! Free clinic that is, yea being broke does not have shit to do with it but I'm putting shit on blast. Haha!

I'm so silly.

When you see me don't speak. When my name is metioned act like you don't who I am. I wish you both a horrible horrible life. Sadness daily and anger every other hour. I wish you no reason to smile for the rest of your pointless existence.

Do not ever disrespect me!
That is all.
Thank you!

-END

Little Laughs

The smallest things can put your mind at ease and make your heart smile. My mind has been racing since about 3 am and it will not stop. Thank God for the beautiful girl that is Ma'Leeha-Yaviana! Her small giggles at nothing are honestly making my day. God has blessed my life with her presence, I swear she has taught me so much. Never stop until you get what you want and always laugh, even when it is not funny! Two year olds can make or break your day and she is making mine!

Where did it all go?

Respect.

Dignity.

Integrity.

I really wish that I could see more of this on a daily basis. I want to see it from my friends, family and associates. I want to see it more of it within my self. I want people to realize their self worth and address that in every day life. If you do not think highly of yourself do something in your life so that you can. Where did it all go?

It has been lost between the feelings of abandonment and the agonizing defeat of loneliness. Grasp onto what is good, hold onto it and make it better. These three aspects may be lost now but they are not gone forever.

-END

When you least expect it

People really will surprise you when you least expect it. I guess you have to give some people credit for the things that they do. Even when it may be different from what you will do. Some people out here really do know what they are doing. I guess it is fine to have a little bit of faith in people.

-END

Why do right?

Lately I have been accessing every situation that I can, even if it does not have to do with me. Wondering why people act the way they do and do what they do. If they are doing it for themselves or if they are trying to please other people. I have noticed that people are selfish and pathetic. Actions I have seen are simply lazy, desperate and inconsiderate. I see words with so much meaning tossed into the air as if there were nothing. I see people being lied to and embarrassed. I also see these same people afraid to express how they really feel. If everyone is in it for them, why do right? Let us all lie to get whatever we want or whatever we may need. Let us all be the lowest people that we can be for small insignificant moments of satisfaction.

This blog is entitled "Why do right?" Do it because no one else is doing it. Seems like nobody wants to conform to society these days. Well be different. Take the first step and be honest with yourself. You have to live with yourself so make sure your doing right and ask yourself. Are you proud of who you are? Would you want your children to act like you?......

-END

It is 4:15 AM

Think of how many people you come in contact with every single day. The ones that you know and also those who are strangers. Think of the thoughts and feelings you have towards all these people. Are they negative? Are they mean? If you were given the opportunity to speak with every single person would you listen or talk first? When you did have your turn to speak would say what you first thought when you seen them?

Take the time to listen. Have the patience to listen first and the respect to speak last. Take every single word they say as if it were there last and you were the only one that they could speak to. Would you take the time?

After listening to their words, stories, and their life do you still think your first thought? Do you still want to to share it with them?

Before you speak always think, after you have thought, think one more time. These people that you pass may look fine on the outside but past their blank faces could be a pain so deep you would not even be able to comprehend. They may have had made some decisions in their life that they cannot change that you could not even fathom to choose. While you were passing your judgment with your eyes when you walk passed a burning pain singed their heart. Such a saddening heat within their body their fingertips looked red. You never knew though. Does that make it ok?

What if it was your statement that sent them to the edge. What if it was your judgmental ways that made them fall to their knees?

We can never know what is going on in peoples lives or if they will be there tomorrow so that we can apologize. Walk slowly pass these people and smile, hope they are doing well. Tread so slowly and carefully choose your words. You don't ever want to be the one to blame for someones horrible, maybe last day.

Story of my Life.

Why me? What did I do?
Now I am a very confident female and sometimes I feel myself a little too much. I love myself, the way I am, look, and dress. Nobody can ever bring me down. Basically I am hot ish and I don't care what anybody has to say about it. I know that I am desirable, and yes honey your man does want me but the things that have been occurring lately I do not understand. I am not Nicki Minaj nor am I Trinia. My hair is not down my back, my eyes are not exoctic and I do not have an ass out this world. So please tell me why BOYS continue to lie on me. No sir, we never had sex. No sir, you never slept in my bed. Excuse me sir you are 20 yrs old why are you lying? SMH. I mean do boys lie and tell people you have sex because the girl in question has an amazing personality? NO! Lets be serious. I am a cute chick but nothing to be lied about. At least I do not think so. Boys are so silly! Get it together LAMES!

My last blog like this was a little angry, I see I am making great strides!

-END

Secrets

Just in case anybody was wondering, secrets no longer exist. Yes! It is true. Everyone will find out everything that you do. Therefore if you are ashamed of it and do not want people to know, well don't do it! I promise you it is that simple. I will let you know about the inspiration behind this blog.
Females, yea yall! I say yall because I am not in this category. If you do not want people to know you are having sex with him, his friend and his roommate. Then do not do it. Please do not confuse this with the neck rolling females that say "get out of my business", because this is a completely different situation. It is perfectly fine not to want people in your business, but if you are solely acting because you think people are not going to find out. Eh. Eh. Get it together! There are no such things as secrets.

-END

Why Not?

Who made the saying you cannot always have what you want. Why not? Seriously. I am almost 2o years old and I have gotten everything that I wanted. Not so much in a materialistic sense, but more of responses from people. Well what it really boils down to is attention and then some. I know what I want, then 15 minutes later I want something else but then something is always holding me back from that second thing that I think I want. I probably only want it because of the challenge. That cannot be good. Smh! Maybe I should just go for it and see how it works out? Or maybe I should stick to my morals and do what is right? Well then again I don't know what right is in this situation.

I know I should stay away so that is what I am going to do.

-END

Stephanie Documentation 11

I hate how quickly my mind changes. Ugh. I could be thinking on thing and then have a conversation about it and be thinking about the next. So annoying. That was Stephanie Documentation 11!

-end

Wo Wo Back it up

I am the first to point out someones flaws. Always the first to pass judgment on peoples actions. Well let me take this time to back up all the way out of peoples business and flaws and worry about my own. Lord knows that I have them. Let me be the first to tell everyone that I have not been acting in my character lately, and I am not proud of this at all. I have finally set back and reevaluated the entire situation and I am turning into one of them. I was on the verge, I am talking on the edge of the cliff. Thank God I took ten steps back. Wo Wo Back it up Stephanie. ALL THE WAY UP!

I will not be apart or to be blame on someone's unhappiness, intentionally that is.
I now realize that I cannot have everything that I want, every cannot belong to me.

Karma was tapping my shoulder reminding me that she is a bigger bitch than I am and I need not to mess with her.

I apologize for my thoughts and my behavior for egging on the situation.

I do not want to be one of those girls, therefore I am done.

I have just now remembered what I am worth and what I deserve. I will not be the one to sell myself short. Respect, dignity and honesty will always be apart of my character.

Stephanie Documentation 10

Everyone always says that we cannot help the way we feel but we can control our actions. Just needed to remind myself of that.

-end

What we say

I really do not think people understand the power of the tongue. Words can really hurt someone mentally and emotionally. I am speaking beyond hurting someones feelings I mean having an enormous impact on someones life in the most negative of ways. Do you want to be responsible for someones unhappiness. I speak from experience because half of the things that I say to people when I am angry are uncalled for. Watch what you say and how you say it. Try to not let your emotions get the best of you because regrets are not a good thing to have. I am trying to be more careful everyday with what I say and for those who know me can understand that it is a work in progress.
-end

Official

I like to think that I know myself very well but sometimes I amaze myself. I love to chill, we don't even have to be doing anything I just like being around people. Mainly males because we share the same sense of humor. I can chill with females but things always seem to turn into a competition. Not with males though. I had a great weekend chilling with the homies. I am officially just that girl who is going to chill with males. Official.
-end

Quicker than the Seasons

My mood and attitude changes quicker than the seasons. I want this and then I want that. I need some consistency in my life. When it snows I could be happy when it falls but by the time they shovel it up I could be depressed like someone stole my puppy. Samething happens with people, just quicker than the seasons.
-end

I am awake

I was asleep and now I am up. I am angry. Very angry. If I was up for the reason I want ted to be up then everything would be cool. FML! Just come here!

Off Limits

Again this is from my blackberry.

Why is that when things or certain aspects of life are off limits we find them more attractive? Or is it just me? Please take a moment to think about this. People under the age of 21 want to drink. People under the age of 18 want to smoke and both of these ages want to go to the club. The same things apply to people. Those who are attachted in some sort of way always seem more attractive. UGH!

What happened to learning from our mistakes! Apparently I cannot do that!

-end

Stephanie Documentation 9

I type this from my blackberry, that's how bad I need to get this out. I enjoyed your company and appreciated your concern for my weLl being. Thanks for being next to me and keeping me warm. I'm so good, cool and content.

Temporary Smiles

Lately it has been because of you. I do not know how I feel about that but that is what it is. I am mad that I am smiling right now. I do not know what it is about you and I do not think I want to know. I say it is temporary because I have not faith in your sex. I appreciate your empty words but I love the gentlemen in you. I just wanted to say thank you for these temporary smiles.
So...Thank You!

-end

Dissapointment

Does disappointment equal irritation, is it the same thing? Well if it not the same thing they most definitely correlate and stem from each other. Even though I would rather be irritated than disappointed I hate them both, especially when it is from unexpected people. What did I do to you? I would love to be informed so that I can apologize and make sure that I do not do again. I do not care about being wrong I just want the same friendship we had. It angers me more and more each day that I do not why you continue to act like this. I am disappointed in your actions and lack of words to me. This is not you. I am to the point where I am just going to let you know how everything is and how it going to be.

Do not punish because of the way that other people treat you.
Talk do not ignore, I have learned that from experience.

Be very aware of the example that you are setting.
I hope that hit hard. Thanks!

-end

How much is to much.

People make mistakes, I get that and accept that.I make mistakes as well seeing how I am a person. Lol. So obvious. We forgive when people are wrong and give them chances. How many chances are too much? When do you give you?How much can you take from one person?!?!

Stephanie Documentation 8

rough day.
from 8 am until now....just rough
I smiled a few times...just a few
UGH!
I have nothing else to say.
Stephanie is not having a good day and Stephanie does not like this.

Not my day

Today is not my day. You know how people say you must have woken up on the other side of the bed, well I woke up under the bed. Today is not my day. Who wakes up with an attitude, I am talking about since 8:15 AM. Who does that? I have been so tired and unhappy lately it's crazy. I have been on edge and every person I have spoken to besides 3 people have managed to piss me off even more. UGH! This is crazy. I cannot even pinpoint what is wrong with me so how am I supposed to know how to fix it. I took a shower, took a nap, ate good and kept to myself. I kept to myself for the safety of other peoples emotions and my own sanity. I hope tomorrow is better. Much better.

Uninvited Attention

I am well aware of how I act, how I am blah blah. Yes it would be perfectly fine if someone called me an attention whore. I am what I am. But when I do not do anything and receive I get this sort of rush. I say rush for lack of a better word, I don't know how to describe it but it's just different. It is like something being handed to you without working for it. Well this happen last night and I just did not know what to do with it. The attention was uninvited and I don't even know how to respond to him.

Stephanie Documentation 7

I am what I am. Deal. Thank you. I change my mind every five minutes so yes I am indecisive. Problem? Oh well. I like what I like when I like it. No comments or suggestions. Once again I say thank you. Let me live MY LIFE. Laugh at my jokes and smile at my decisions. I choose. You watch. Love you. Sometimes. This is just what it is.

-end

They don't get it.

This will not be the first and probably not the last time I will have to say this, I am honestly something you are not used to. Funny thing is that they don't get it. I always thought actions speak louder than words but I guess not. So I am going to break it down. I am a female who holds such high standards for myself it's crazy. I mean so crazy that many need not apply. Not all males but most males approach on bullshit and they get shutdown so quickly they don't even remember to get mad. Hoes don't like me because they don't understand me. The way I act and the way I carry myself confuses them. All of a sudden I am stuck up and think I am the baddest thing walking. Just so everyone is aware that IS NOT the case. My time is valuable so I choose who I spend it with very wisely. Where as hoes will jump and flip RIGHT ONTO their backs to please any male that shows them some attention. I am something you are not used to. Don't knock what you don't understand. I am a different breed from the majority of the females that are around. That is why most males do not know how to act around me. It is so simple to understand. I am classy! So I finally figured out that is why people lie on me. Because they just don't get it. The males want because nobody has ever had me, females get mad cause I stole there shine. So in there small minds they create what they want to be true. I was mad at first but now it is silly. I am somewhat flattered. Think of me always in whatever way you want to but as soon as lies comes to surface I WILL SNAP! I mean in the most ignorant and disrespectful of ways. This is not a threat, I can gurantee you that I will follow through on my word. No opinions, suggestions or comments need to be made on the way I choose to live my life! This is the last time I will be this nice about a situation. Love me long time since I am always on your mind! KISSES BITCHES!

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Assured

Let me start off by saying that I had an amazing night last night. Full of laughs, good music and great people. during my wonderful something amazing occurred. Something was reinforced, I was assured! In the back of my mind I have been wondering if it is really true that I can get what I want. Usually I am a strong believer but only lately my mind has been teetering on the idea. Well baby I am back! HAHA. It is true, I Stephanie Long can have whatever I want. If I want I am going to get it, I am glad to see nothing has changed. Just so we are all clear I am an attention whore, but only in the best possible way. I will never make myself look stupid or thirsty but I will always have the attention that I want. Let me end by saying that I had an amazing night last night.

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Stephanie Documentation 6

Last night was a goodnight. I faced my fears and addressed my flaws. I know what I want and how to get it. I am more focused now than ever. I am more aware and prepared. I am cautious but I am living. Blessed and thankful!

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Thought of you

It would be an understatement if I said I missed you.
I miss your presence.
The ability to actually see and touch you.
To be able to make the distinction from what you say and what you actually mean by looking into your eyes.
I miss how you let me have my way SOMETIMES lol, because most of the time I am right!!
I miss the low rumble of your laugh and how you can really never find the right words when you speak. But within those words that you can never find I always sense that everything is always going to be ok. Somehow your courage brings me a level of security and something beyond comfort. It may not make sense but when it doesn't make sense that is when it is the best.
The aspects of you that I miss the most is something I can't touch and what I cannot necessarily see, but it is there. It will always be there.
It would be an understatement if I said I missed you.

Holla If Ya Need Me - Trey Songz

Mouth says no, head shakes yes

Is it just me that hates when your friends call you out on something you did not want them to know. Something you thought you were hiding so well, and they just put it on blast. It can be so irritating at times. NOBODY IS SUPPOSED TO KNOW. It is kind of nice that my friends are paying so much attention to me. They notice the comments I make and how my eyes wonder when certain people enter. I will never admit it out loud, if they ask me I will only laugh. They know when I say no I sort of kinda don't mean it at all.

Especially when you wish did not feel the certain way that you do. You know? What they just put on blast.

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Good Night.

So this blog really should be three separate ones if you ask me but due to time I am going to stuff it all in here.

Part 1
A friend of mine and I have not spoken in about 3 days and yea it had been bugging me but of course I act like it doesn't. Well there was a party at his house and of course I went. I was not going to speak to him first so I walk pass and speak to someone else. Does he pay any attention to me? NO! I am not used to this at all but I just keep on like everything was normal. For awhile. Then I make myself noticeable. Basically I put the bate infront of his face and BITES it! :) A walk upstairs and a few apologies later everything is all good. Friends again! YAY! I missed him and he missed me. Good to know your thought about it. I was nice to have the attention again, stopped everything he was doing pulled me aside, away from the party sat down and talked to me. We need people like this in our life.

Part 2
This year has been a little different for me and a particular person. Let's name him John, that is a basic name. Last year it was a little intense, seen and talked to him everyday. This year that is not the case at all. I am fine with that, but I am the type of female that always has to know she can get it back. Regardless of the situation. Until tonight I was not sure that I could. Silly me. I always say I hate being wrong but I was kind of happy I was tonight. If I wanted what John and I had last year. I WILL GET IT! It is on his mind as often as it is on mine. We are only 2 weeks into school John. Where we going with this?

Part 3
Eyes. Lips. Smile and arms.
Deep. Full. Bright and firm.
At first glance I passed.
When I heard I didn't even care.
But now....
My eyes were stuck...on your
Eyes. Lips. Smile and arms
P.S. I thought it was pretty smooth how we both stuck around when they all left. I know you seen me looking and that was the plan

This was my Good night....so with that goonight!

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My First was today

It was good.
It was so hot
Too hot.
It was long.
It was very intense.
There was alot going on.
It was hard to pay attention.
It was alot of fun.
I screamed.
I laughed.
I left satisfied.
My first soccer game was very interesting, we won too. Beat a highly ranked school. GO TEAM!

I was wrong.

Gross. Waste of my time. Cannot believe I even looked at you like that. We live, we learn, and it's your loss.

Goodbye Whore! haha

Trey

So I have been in love with Trey Songz since he cut his hair off. I have always been a fan of his music but when he cut his hair my appreciation was much deeper. His talents were shown on his mix tapes and remakes of songs. A couple of my favorites would be "Your girlfriend can come too" and "Bust your windows", Trey really did his thing. Now that Trey Songz album is released we have been seeing a lot of him and I ain't mad at that. So last night I tuned into Ustream to watch Trey LIVE, do not judge me. As I was watching him I begin to get a little annoyed. The computer is frozen because of where he lives and the phone is not working. So he leaves, he goes and gets in the car so he can have service. I appreciated that because he promised his fans that he would speak to them. So he is really trying. So finally the computer is acting right but now all of sudden is phone is about to die. REALLY!?! At this point I am really over, then he begins to complain about all this stuff. Whining really. "This is the only day with my family and I am out here with yall....." Ew. Gross goodbye. Then I felt like he was trying to get smart with some girl on the phone. I know celebrities are not who we really see on the T.V. but come on now Trey. So I am sad to tell you guys that I fell out of love last night. Oh and I just read on Bossip (get hip) that he openly admitted he had crabs! GROSS! Trey I love your music but I am not a fan of you. Not that you should care about one persons opinion but I unfollowed you on Twitter. You disgust me a little! Keep the music coming though.

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Friends or WHATEVER!

So I have not been on here in awhile and it really hurts my soul. I have missed you so much but I am happy to be back. So I am really good friends with this girl and she has just rekindled a wack ass friendship with someone that I do not like. Now look I live my life and only my life so she can make her own decisions. The only problem is when my name comes up. Oh, honey I am not for that! I do not like that girl and never will. POINT BLANK! I have never had a trust issue with you the whole time we have known each other until now and I do not like it. I hate it. I know that I am going to have to get used to you being friends with her but I am never going to like it nor respect it. I think this whole rekindling of this friendship is beyond stupid you live like 14 hours away. You say you let stuff go, that is wonderful I do no think we should dwell in the past. But I feel that it is ignorant to just simply erase the character flaws that made you end the friendship in the first place. This is so irritating to me, I cannot even find the words to express myself in the best way. Be friends but leave me out of it in every single way. I do not want her saying my name and I do not want you to say it either. I do not care if she is asking how I am doing like she did the other day tell her I SAID I do not want her saying my name. Why does she even care how I am doing? Look, there are to many people in this world for everybody to be friends. We are not enemies she is just there. JUST THERE. I do not have to pay attention her.

Just thought I would let you know!
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Let me help you understand.

I have this small small school girl crush on someone, well at least I thought I did. I mean he is nice, kind of strange but I mean it works. He makes me laugh, so major POINTS for that. I am completely aware that nothing is perfect but this dude just made me sooo mad. So I need to help him understand. I am not something you are used to so please check your self and come at me correctly. Step it up. When I say step up I mean every aspect of your existence. It seems like your used to little girls trailing behind you and cheering you on. Let me help you understand that I am far from a cheerleader and currently could careless about your capable of. Man, your so confused but it's cool you will soon find out what you go yourself into. Now that I have blogged about it I am not mad anymore. Lol. All smiles.

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30 going on 15

Think back! "Go Away". Oh boy I mean it more than ever right now. This heifer is like a road block on my whole entire life and I need a bulldozer. I tried to be cool about it because our beef is so very old but she wanted bring it back up. But in a whole new kind of way. I am not going to get into the particulars or play the name game. Know that she is wrong just like she was last year. She thought wrong and then acted wrong but I definitely told her off in the RIGHT way. She is going on thirty and acting like she is 15. She wants him because he wants me. Lol. True story no exaggeration, it what it is. HA! Even if he did not want me what makes you think he wants you? The last one wanted me too! And I heard how you didn't even want him until he said something about me. LAME! Ha! You are so silly for that one! How about I keep the one from last year and throw this new on in front of your face too. Well, I actually would not do that because it looks bad on my part. I just need to know that you are sssooo very lame for that. Step it up honey. I will embarass you again. Let go of the past and the anger and grow up. No hard feelings just thought I would let you know that I am fully aware of your stupid actions and comments.

Stephanie Documentation 5

Just waking up but still in the same place. I have homework, I need to get dressed because I have Sunday dinner at my uncles. I cannot get up. I want to but I can't. UGH!

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Stephanie Documentation 4

Stephanie did not say sorry. Stephanie felt very uncomfortable in her own skin. That is not normal My mind is over it but my actions do not act like it. It is early there will probably be one more entry today.

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Untitled

Well. I do not know what to say. I don't know what I want to do. Right now I don't even know who I am. I thought I was outspoken and confident but now I see myself cowering in a corner.Is this blog good for me? Is it good for others? When are you not supposed to let people know how you feel? Should keeping the peace always be priority. I used to know all of those answers. Well maybe I didn't. Maybe I didn't care.

Hate when I am wrong. Especially about people. Always invest my time into the wrong people. That sucks. Wish someone would prove me wrong!

Lately I have been getting irritated very easily. Like more than normal! It sucks.

Why do I do things when they are wrong. Doesn't that make it worse. I need to work on myself.

Listening to sooner than later...Drake. Do me a favor...If I pull it together. Everybody got the same story huh? Makes me think. How many chances are too many.

next, A Night Off. Makes me smile.

I apologize for the pointless randomness of this blog. I just keep typing trying to figure out what is wrong with me.

Is it bad when you want the attention. Just you and no one else? Then put those others down. Is that a hater. I hope not. I don't do it intentionally. I am very aware that there are alot of people that are better than me in many different ways. Maybe I just do not want to accept it. I am sorry.

Am I as happy as I make it seem? I am blessed and appreciate that but it feels like something is missing. Or maybe I am thinking to much.

I wonder what I need. This void in my life is beginning to be painful.

I'm over it.

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Stephanie Documentation 3

Don't you hate when you have to start a story with "OMG Last night". I do. So here we go.
OMG last night. I have to stop. End of Story. Oh and I know way to much information and some of that got out last night. Oops. This day should be interesting. How many times can Stephanie say sorry in on day. I will let you guys now.

Stephanie Documentation 2

I love when I truly know that I am over people. When they continue to show there hideous colors. Goodbye. You no longer matter. Also congratulations you have made into the second entry of the Stephanie Documentation. This is the highlight of your whole entire existence.

Glad to say they are mine

This blog has been inspired by a recent conversation I have had. Let me know if you can figure it out, a bit of mystery involved.

With you it is your generosity. I am surprised that you are so generous especially being an only child. I appreciate that all your intentions are always good. In no way have you ever been malicious. I am happy to see you stand up for your self more and more each day. I love the respect that you hold for yourself. I see you doing great things in life. Success is definite for you. The label hoe factor we have in common is amazing!:)

Secretly you are my favorite. Your intelligence is what I appreciate most about you. I value your opinions more than anybody elses. Your company is constantly needed and I wish you could be around all the time. You presence makes things come alive. Not everyone can do that. People rarely have bad things to say about you. I never do for the record. I trust you more than anyone and I love your none judgmental conversations about my life and choices. With the passion behind your chosen field you will also be successful. Oh btw....flyest male I know! :)

Sometimes I wish that we could go back to highschool. Things were so much better for us back then. Happy go lucky is what I think of you. What I envy most about is your resilence, I wish I had it like you do. What I love most is how open your heart is. Your so open, your so accepting and so positive. You can easily brighten up any ones day. I honeslty think that you are the most mature friend I have, I say that because you give chances and oppurtunities for people in your life. Not in a naive since though. I don't know it is kind of hard to explain.

It has been the longest for us. WOW. Now that I think about it, it makes me smile. Regardless of the past and MY WRONGS I am proud of you and us. Thanks for putting up with me and accepting my apologies. I don't even think you can fully comprehend how important you are and not just to me but involving everything. I love that you can live and let go. I respect some aspects of your care free attitude because sometimes people really should not care. My favorite thing about you is that you are ALWAYS A GREAT TIME! Regardless of whoever and whatever you are going to have a good time.

I love you all and I am happy to say that you are mine. My friends! :)

Stephanie Documentation 1

I am like a difficult puzzle that can never be finished, just when you think you have me figured out you get confused all over again. I stared smiling at 2:00 and did not stop until I left class. Lets see where this goes. Hopefully far.

I forgot to mention

Remember when I said I was in love with a stranger. It was just a few blogs ago. Well yea...not so much. I have fallen out of love and left him in the past. Goodbye stranger it was nice not knowing you. I have moved and I wish you the best. Maybe one day when I learn your name we can be friends. In the words of James Blunt "goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend".

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Excuse My Language!!

I am not proud of how I am about to speak. I have approached all my blogs with the utmost respect and tried to explain my feelings to the best of my ability. This one is not like the others, I guess I named it ReadwithCAUTION for a reason.

This simple bitch ass dude had the nerve to lie on me. YES ON ME! Oh had to be delirious or having a real sweet dream like Beyonce' said. Honey NO not never have you ever had the pleasure of residing in this similar to the motha fuckin niagra shit. No bitch you were never drenched in my lovely (lol). No NOT EVER. Never will you ever have the pleasure. Not even if it was your last wish on your death bed. Please know that your girlfriend will be informed of this, I am sure she will not like that at all. Oh and your teammates already know and they definatley look at you differently. You never had a chance with me. You knew that and thats why you lied. I heard you gave alot details. Oh boy you had to be fantasizing about me. Heard the story lasted a good ten minutes. DAMN. I'm even that great when it aint true. I must be real close to something like a bad bitch for you to lie on me. KEEP TALKIN WITH YO DUSTY BUSTED ASS! MAKE ME FAMOUS CUNT. MAKE ME FUCKIN FAMOUS. I swear I'm top notch, I mean I gotta be in your eyes atleast. Let me stop because I think I am starting to feel myself!

kisses!

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Friends worth fighting for

It really warms my heart that I am cared about. It makes me more than happy. Well you all remember the infamous blog entitled I'm not your other friend. Boy did that get some publicity. Well blogger all is well with the friend that was up for discussion in that blog. I got about 3 voice mails of her snapping and that is how I know she cares. She called me out on my bull and brought the situation up for discussion which I should have done a long time ago. Her feeling were hurt by my blog and I never meant for that to happen. I did not intend on being malicious at all. I just want to say that I love you and I honestly believe that I am blessed to have a friend like you. Mistakes are supposed to be made and also forgiven. I forgave you and I thank you for forgiving me. You are a beautiful person inside out and do not change for anybody. From your generosity to your big heart you are an amazing person to be around. When you told me you respected me it meant the world to me. Your sincerity truly touched me. I hope you know your great! Know that you deserves the best and you should not settle. They say time is of the essence and when I spend my time with you it never goes unappreciated. Your great friend. Through the good and bad. Flaws and all we gonna be ok!

Go Away!

Why is that when we think we are done with people that they always come back. I do not understand! Why can't they just go away! It made my stomach turn a little bit when I seen it. The being that is her, the essence of lies, and the stench that is her presence truly upsets me. It is not necessarily anger it is closer to frustration and lack of patience. You graduated why are you on campus? Why are you hanging out with people on campus? I do not get it. UGH! I just have this feeling that this year is going to be just like last year. Tricks having attitudes over dudes they never really had. Why are you coming back if you are so miserable? What it boils down to is her being sick. She just is not there. In the head.

Whatever I'm pissed. I cannot even blog about. I wish she would just go away.

Do not feel special!

Well well well! School is about to start and it is hot outside. In more ways than one I might add. Temperatures are rising and so are some egos. Let me be the first to let all these overly excited freshman and their friends that the looks they are receiving from certain THIRSTY upperclassmen need not be responded too. If they only knew. Well I will be the one to tell them. First off not none of yall are thee sh*t as you think. Please don't take this like I am hating cause I really do not know how to do that. Second of all if you think he wants to hear what you have to say or what your thinking your so off. It was the way you were switching in your tight jeans with your back turned towards that caught his attention. And that is where his attention will remain. Oh little ones listen to what I tell you or will have the mark. It is something like the mark of the beast but much much worst. It has to do with thirst level and people out here are acting dehydrated. Third do not feel special! The looks and smiles mean nothing! Oh and when you start recieving those texts they really do not mean anything. Someone like me can see right through it but silly girls fall for that mess. I can match every text you get honey. And it is my gurantee he (they) will not work half as hard as they did for me. TOOT TOOT! Yea that was the sound of my horn I guess I am kind of feeling myself right now. LOl. I love it. I freaking love it. Take my advice and never feel special when it come to this. That will be your first mistake.

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Last Night's Revenge!

Revenge is a beautiful thing in every way, shape and form. When its spiteful. When it's funny and even when it's sad. You might think I am wrong for saying this but I will always be honest with you. I have this friend named Rob and the other day he lied to me. When I say friend I literally mean friend nothing more. I just want to clarify because you know how people think. Well he decided to lie about someones whereabouts when I had already spoken to the person he was lying for or about. Last night I was able to get him back and it was in the funniest way. It was around midnight and I took the keys from his roommate and went into his room with my friend. Now Rob lives with two boys and lets just say there are a few rumors about him that hint around him being a tambourine player. If you know what I mean. Well we both sit on his bed and he scoots over to make room. Weird? You decide for yourself! We then begin to slowly and softly stroke his back. He then begins to grumble. Does not wake up and does not move just groans. I then lift up his shirt and rub his back and still he does not wake up. My friend begins to rub his back and now he is moaning! MOANING! I am talking full on bow wow chika wow wow porn star moaning. Moving is head making himself more and more comfortable. Now just keep this in mind. It is after midnight the door is locked and when he went to sleep he was by himself. When two people sit on his bed he does not jump up he moans and groans. LOL! I took it upon myself to inform members of the soccer team which he is apart of! Today will be a good day! Remember do not ever lie to me. This was only his first offense next time it will be even worse!

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I am in love.

I have only been here for three days and I am already in love. OK! L-O L-O L-O V-E, as Ashlee Simpson says. I made my way from my room to the gym and there he was. In all his beauty just looking like he needed me in his life! I usually see myself leaning towards the darker, you know like Tyrese but this man is more of a Chris Brown. And I am ok with that. Now I don't know his name but I will soon find out. I am in love! So very in love with this stranger!

First Impressions

Are first impressions really everything? Are they really that important? I think they are, you never forget what you think the first time you meet or see someone. The thing is do you give the person a chance to improve your thoughts of them if your first encounter is horrible. Or do you just leave things be because you know you are never going to forget that horrendous first impression.

It is just to bad for the character I met last night his chances are so very slim. So slim that in actuality they do not exist. Can I change my tone?..Thank you.This fool walk in my room beyond drunk without introducing himself and make his self comfortable. He came with two of my friends from last year but that does not make it right. Being me...."Excuse you, who are you?"...He slurs a few apologies and then tells me his name which at this point I do not even care. I want him gone. I oblige his presence for a few minutes more because I enjoyed laughing at my two friends who were also drunk. Later he begins to comment on my looks and what he can do for me. Well to me I should say. Think about it...jaw drop...yeah! I look at him eyes wide open mouth tightly gripped look at one of my friends he quickly changes the subject. That was strike two and I guess we can Jamie Foxx it. (Blame It) I now have an attitude and want him to do something else so I can snap. The only thing he does is stand up so I tell him to sit down or leave. My friends finally notice that I am completely over the situation and they have over stayed their welcome. My friend apologizes for his associates behavior and they were on there way.

Does he deserve another chance?!?!?!

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I want to be.

I want to be the friend that always listens. The friend who has the best advice. The friend who always knows what to do. I want to be the woman who is respected. I want to be the woman who is loved. I want to be the person that always makes you laugh. I want to be the person who is known for being extremely honest. I want to be the one remembered in a positive way. I am going to be the person who is going to be successful. I am the person I need to be right now. I will grow. I will change. I will be the same and I will remain. When you subtract adding comes next. Take away the bad and be filled with greatness. I want to be me and I want you to love that. Perfection is not attainable so look at my flaws in the most optimistic of ways. Look beyond, look deep find the greatest aspect and focus. I promise I will do the same. I want to be Stephanie. I am what I am...for right now that is. Do you accept it?

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Don't use me!

Well I am finally where I wanted to be. My excitement has settled but I am far from disappointed. My room is more than what I expected and I have everything I need. I am so grateful for that and beyond happy. The feelings of confusion I have are for the people that I am surrounded by. Friends from last year and new and old people surprising me with their actions. Being visited by people is nice, respect from people who I haven't had the best relationship with is inspiring and when the person you care about the most is acting so out of character is upsetting. You know how things are worse when they happen so suddenly and you do not really expect them. Well this one hit me like a ton of bricks and I don't think I deserve it.

Why is that females always put the current boy that is in there life ahead of the femals that have to listen about them complain all the time. The same boy you go running to see was the same boy that had you crying at 2 A.M. You remember right? When you called me and woke me up! I do not like being used as an excuse. Do not have an alterior motive when you say your coming to see me. Be real up front. Go head and be in his face, if your in love thats great but do not use me.

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Im so special!

I have been in my new dorm for about two hours now and I have managed to lock myself out of my room. CLAP, CLAP! Thank you very much. It is actually pretty hilarious to me that I did this but I feel so dumb. But you do need to laugh at yourself sometimes and boy am I laughing. I am literally sitting in the hall and typing this blog while Skyping with my friend Kiara. I might add that I am impatiently waiting for security to come and let me in. My livelihood is in that room. My phone and my Chanel wallet! OH! Wait! HE IS HERE! PAUSE!......Saved! It feels good to be back! I have just learned that when you turn the handle up it locks automatically. Hmmmm. Good to know. Well thanks blogger for helping the time go by! Talk to you soon!

Need a Laugh

I am kind of irritated right now so I need a laugh.




hahahahaa

Love is Hate

I was with a friend the other day and she told me she hated someone. A friend of another friend. Someone that we never really have dealt with. You know how that goes. Well anyways she said she hated her and I said no you don't. You just don't like that she acts like that. She stated again that she HATES this girl. Strong on her beliefs that were on a very weak foundation. I said to her that you can't hate something that you never have loved. You can only hate something as much as you have loved it in the past. Do you believe this? I do! Let me explain. To hate something you must understand it. If you don't understand it than you are ignorant to the real reason as to why you think you hate. The highest level of understanding and/or accepting something is love. To love, you have the highest regard for something and understand it or them on many different levels. When something or someone changes from this or hurts you, you then hate everything that you once loved. Everything that you once understood has no gone array. Your feelings of confusion, sense of being lost and the aggravation of change then evolve to hate. That is after you have loved.

I want to go to Tennessee

I have wanted to leave Ohio for about 64 days now and my destination has always been Indiana because that is where I go to school. With the date rapidly approaching for me to leave I find myself excited but not as excited as I thought I would be. And you want to know why? Because I want to go to Tennessee. A dear friend of mine goes there and I miss him ssooo much. And he has not even been gone that long. I WANT TO GO TO TENNESSEE!! NOT NOW BUT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't lie to me!

Alot of people find certain things funny, alot of people can find laughter with anything. I am not one of those people. When some one trips I'll laugh when someone falls I will laugh especially if it is down some stairs. But one thing I cannot laugh at is lying or liars. I cannot not stand it. Lie to your mom, your boyfriend/girlfriend or whoever BUT DO NOT LIE TO ME. If I ask you something you are better off remaining silent than lying. First off when people lie to me it is in insult to my intelligence and if you cannot tell, let me inform you I am not dumb. Secondly lying is considered a cowardly act to me. Why are you lying anyways. Are you afraid?...You shouldn't be of me atleast, I'm barely 120 lbs, I might say something that will profoundly penetrate your psyche and break every thread of self confidience that you hold but for the most part no physical violence will be done. I aint a lover but Im not a fighter either. It hasn't ever gotten that far. The inspiration for this blog angers me even more, it was not a friend that lied to me but a very close relative. I have lived in the same house with them before, I grew up with this person. And she is going to lie to me?...It didn't hurt that emotion means nothing to me anger is the one I deal best with. It pissed me of to the highest extent. DO NOT LIE TO ME! Especially about insignificant things that I could care less about. You look so stupid and then when my name becomes involved in one of your "stories"....Oh that's it. Im done with you and your BS sitaution. Don't lie to me and most definatley not better lie on me. I am really not the one. Just because your incapable to handle a situation that I told you you were not ready for. NOT MY PROBLEM. Just because you failed miserably at the task at hand that I told you not to do again that is NOT MY PROBLEM! So I ask why? WHY? WHY? WHY? After all the stupid selfish things you do, why would you place yourself infront of my firing squad and basically put your finger on the trigger. How did she do this? When she did the bodily actions of parting her lips to let my name leave and a lie follow. Babygirl this is just the beginning. I told you years ago don't cross me and you just did. You will pay and you will not enjoy it but once again. NOT MY PROBLEM.

Kanye just PISSED me off.

Kanye is known for saying what is on his mind and I appreciate that, most of the time it is pretty entertaining. But this time he crossed the line. It an interview he said that he was the new KING OF POP. SERIOUSLY??!?!?!.....UM How about no. I am not even trying to knock Kanye's music. Some of his stuff is real nice...my personal favorite Good Life....but King of Pop...no your not touching Michael Jackson.....END OF STORY!

You know everyone loves and respects Michael but times change. It’s so sad to see Michael gone but it makes a path for a new King of Pop and I’m willing to take that on. There’s nobody who can match me in sales and in kanye west respect so it only makes sense for me to take over Michael’s crown and become the new King,” said West.

“First there was Elvis, then there was Michael, now in the 21st century its Kanye’s time to rule. I have nothing but respect for Michael but someone needs to pick up where he left off and there’s nobody better than me to do that. I am the new King of Pop.”

Do not cross Esther!

Over the weekend I was asked to see Orphan, reluctantly I said yes. I normally don't do scary movies because I don't like the whole evil spirit zombie type thing. Surprisingly this movie did not have that. It was more realistic and I appreciated that. The foreshadowing was great and the character development as well. I was at the edge of my seat the whole entire time. If your wondering if I screamed the answer is YES! I was legitimately afraid of Esther. Not the movie but Esther. SHE WAS NUTS. I was afraid of everything she was going to do and every time she was listening. From the bird to the nun she damn near killed every living thing she touched. This movie was sick, twisted and probably tormented alot of people. It amazes me that someones mind could create something so foul and evil. Every scene entered a new level of gut wrenching thrills. Just when you thought it was bad it got worse. Just when you thought she was done she had more to do. Who knew that the human minds capacity could reach as far as it did for the idea of Orphan to even be a thought.
.....I have so much more to say about this and I cannot even find the words....

I ADVISE ALL TO SEE THIS FILM!!....If you have the emotional stability for it.
Esther is waiting!

Chelsea Lately last name Handler

If you have not seen her, you officially mean nothing. Please exit this blog and go play in traffic. She has to be the funniest person on TV right now or maybe I am just overly excited that it is not a reality show. Thinking...thinking...nope she is just that damn funny. We need more people in Entertainment to say whatever is on there mind, drunk or sober. On her show she has 3 to 4 guest. Actors and comedians who also comment on topics. Also hilarious. Well I DVR every episode and I just finished watching one and of course Chelsea and her team of hysterical Asians, sarcastic Jews and joyful gays had me rolling on the floor once again. Is Tori Spelling a man? Amy Whinehouse is the new big foot and guess what Jews? You got more money coming your way. A Trump is converting. Shalom! On this particular episode Chelsea said something that I completley agree with. ALL STEREOTYPES ARE TRUE. Would you like some examples? Fat people are lazy. Black people are loud. White people can't dance. You get the picture. Thank you Chelsea thank you so much because I have been trying to tell the idiots that I am surrounded by that this is true. Do they want to hear it? No, they don't! They pull that over sensitive bull about how every person is different and shake their over worked callused mininum wage paid finger in my face. Then they storm off. Little do they know that while speaking to them I gave them a wonderful production of a stereotype. Which was black people thinking they can say whatever they want. Truth is we can! Chelsea keep up the good work. Keep offending any and everybody and keep a group of wildly different "special" people around your table.

Ugly/I was right

Remember my first blog? You should I mean this is only my third one. It was entitled just say it. Well something just happen which makes what I believe even more true. I get on facebook and my friend has created an album of him and his girlfriend. Now a few month back he called me telling me how much in love he was. Which is great. Honestly, love is a beautiful thing. So I finally see this girl on facebook today and....well....um....let just say that I am assuming her personality is AMAZING and sex game is OUT OF THIS WORLD!(Don't be offended. Im only being a realistic) Because I am going to let you know RIGHT now that this chicks face is not what he was attracted to. Now I know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all the skin deep blah blah blah, but lets face facts. Is she cute? NO! I am so schocked that he is with her because the girls from his past are WWWWAAAAYYYYY better looking! It is like he took this huge jump DOWN...with is eyes closed of course!!! I thought you were suppose to progress when dating. Being me I had to share this with someone...so I call a friend and say hello...she says hello back and I say "Why is (NAME OF BOY)'S girlfriend so ugly"...She begins to laugh and laugh...and then a little more. Im glad I just said it the way I thought it. But serisouly why is she so ugly? Lol. Now you may think I am mean, but hey it aint my fault. She is probably a really nice girl who happens to like her face was smashed with a brick.....So with that said. JUST SAY IT! If you think it...SAY IT.

Is it over?

Struggling with my self proclaimed insomnia I went to the computer and typed in facebook.com. Thinking about a new status and of course just browsing status updates that pop up in my mini feed. And then it hit me. I am beyond annoyed with the word swag. Within 5 minutes I seen it like 10 times. Half the people that claim they have so much do not even know the true definition. If you have it great, I mean really CONGRATULATIONS!! But let it go! and LET IT GO NOW! Its old and a little overrated. The year is 2009 so focus on something else. Please and Thank You! OK. Goodnight!

Just say it.

Just last night I was watching a movie with my family and friends. One of my mother's friends fell asleep and began to snore. Loudly. So as everyone looked around at each other not knowing what to do and not being able to enjoy the movie because of his snoring. I did what I thought was right. I woke him up. I tapped him a few times and said "SERIOUSLY? NO! I am not having it". With that being said he sat up and started watching the movie. I thought it was done after that. As I am walking back to my seat my mom begins to laugh hysterically. Are you confused? I was. So I ask what is so funny? She says you, you always say whatever you want and what ever is on your mind. Is this wrong. NO! Not at all. Now I know this was a long story to get to my point but hey, you get it. I ALWAYS say what is on my mind and never apologize for it. In one way or another people ask for it. Either they literally ask your opinion or they do something that demands your voice. Never hold your tongue. Now I am not saying to snap on everybody that you come in contact with. What I am saying is to always express your thoughts, ideas and opinions in the appropriate way for the certain situation. Take this into consideration with a dash of intellect, a touch of class and some sort of self control. JUST SAY IT!